Sunday, May 15, 2011

Impending End of the World

So as you may or may not have heard, apparently Judgement Day is coming this weekend. According to some loonies, the Rapture is going to occur on May 21, 2011. This Saturday.

'Borrowed' from My Own Private Idaho.

Unfortunately they don't give a time, which kind of worries me. I hope it happens at 11:59 PM or something like that. See, Maryland is home to the Preakness, the second race of the Triple Crown (the Kentucky Derby is the first). It also happens to be this Saturday afternoon, which I think is a conflict of interests, as God will be swamped with prayers for Animal Kingdom, Dialed In, Astrology, Midnight Interlude, Mucho Macho Man, and other greatly named horses. And how can he not let a horse name Norman Asbjornson win?

This is 136th Running of the Race

Anyways, this event isn't just about the horses, it has turned into a reason to drink and celebrate the warmer days, like a pre-Memorial Day weekend party. My parents are having a party at their house, which I'm pretty excited about. There will be friends, family, and booze! With plenty of Black-Eyed Susans, the official mixed drink of the race.

A Black-Eyed Susan- Flower, Drink, or a Very Unfortunately Girl.

I also think that the Rapture is kinda boring. It's been claimed to come so many times, it's now like the boy who cried wolf. People always say the end of the world is coming, but there is nothing to it but trying to get people's attention. Not to mention that the guy who made this 'prediction' has failed every other time he has tried to do this. Why do people keep listening to him? Doesn't we know that the Mayans have several centuries on him, and are clearly more accurate? 2012 seems like a much more convenient doomsday for me.

I think the Mayan's would be upset after all the work put into their snazzy calendar.

The fact is that there is NOTHING to worry about. Life will go on, I'm pretty sure most people will ignore this. There is no reason to fear a Rapture or 2012 or any sort of apocalypse of supernatural nature because IT JUST WON'T HAPPEN. The same stuff has been predicted since the beginning of story telling. It gets people to listen, puts fear in them, sometimes this can make them easier to control. Any sensible person can usually see right through this kind of stuff, but there really are idiots out there that believe every 'prophecy' they hear.

Also, like I said, it's boring. Compared to the real threats to life on Earth, the righteous ascending and months of war with demons just seems 'meh.' When we talk of giant rocks smashing into the Earth, or the immense power of the Sun, or a gamma ray burst which would microwave all life off the surface of the Earth, now those are powerful demises that should be feared.

This Book = Awesome.
Luckily those situations are most likely far off. If you would like to learn more about them or others, I would definitely check out Phil Plait's Death From The Skies! Which I also happen to be currently reading and enjoying thoroughly. So enjoy this coming weekend, bet on some horses, and sip on a Black-Eyed Susan (here's a good recipe).


26 comments:

Zombie said...

When this doesnt happen, they will look like IDIOTS! lol.

Astronomy Pirate said...

Also, the Space Shuttle Endeavour final launch is at 8:56 a.m. EDT Monday Morning! A late reminder, but I hope you can catch it.

Unknown said...

Hehe, awesome post.

I'm writing an open letter to my local town, and putting it in the paper Thursday and Friday. Cost me $20 for a quarter page ad for 2 days (not too bad)

To all that are planning on being Raptured on Judgement Day:

"I will not be coming with you. I am a believer, but strongly believe I will not be raptured. Help me fight the good fight by signing over a car, house, or donating to my paypal. If you transfer a title or deed, you have my word that I will not come to collect until May 22.

Thank you, and God Bless..."

Think it'll work??

Daniel Smotherman said...

No more college football. Will be a sad day.

RedHeadRob said...

It's amazing the things people think up when they want to believe the world will end.

Anonymous said...

These people need to have fun in their life imo and stop talking about the judgement day!

m.m. said...

Ummm.... I feel like there are a bajillion days that have been claimed to be the apocalypse. Even the crazy fundamentalists should know that the Bible specifically says that no one will know when or where the rapture will happen... so I don't know how they can claim to know :/

The Game Store Guy said...

Huh. The Apocalypse again? Oh damn, I guess I better put on my good suit. Til then, enjoy the races!

Elliot MacLeod-Michael said...

Well if he comes back later and says "oops, I forgot to carry a one" I will give him the benefit of the doubt with relation to next month's apocalypse. But just in case the Mayans are right I'm stocking up on Sham-Wows.

Astronomy Pirate said...

Ha, that might work out for a couple of your Mormon buddies, Idaho.

Jack of Diamonds said...

Some people need to relax

Dootzkie said...

I can't wait for this and 2012 to pass. Retarded people giving retarded meaning to a stellar event... Sheesh

Solsby Kid said...

I'll be long gone before any judgement day :D

Patti D. said...

some people are truly stupid

-E- said...

i sort of hope they are raptured away. it would be an improvement to the earth.

Unknown said...

I would love to attend but I have prior engagements.

JayPower said...

I dont believe in this sht!! ;D

BigMike said...

And Jesus will descend from the heavens and announce "All of the rich good-looking people are coming with me to Heaven! I thought I warned you all that the meek were going to be left be hind on earth..."

HiFi said...

It's time to sell some T-shirts because that's what this whole prediction thing really amounts to.

Instead of putting rapture on the T-shirts, we can print out stuff like, "20 billion more years to the sun's lifespan" or "The Debt ceiling isn't really that bad," or, "Wesboro Zombie Uprising." :P

taio said...

que venga el fin del mundo,asi se vera que los cabrones son todos iguales

T. Banacek said...

The only Rapture I fear is that terrible Blondie song.

The Angry Lurker said...

Maxing out my credit cards as I type.

Melanie said...

Looking forward to Saturday!!

ScottD said...

lol remember y2k

MRanthrope said...

some dude was asking about this today atwork. he was scared because he heard something about the world ending on Sat on some Facebook post.

I just laughed and walk away!

Anonymous said...

May 21st? and I'm without pus.. without a woman D:

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